About Shinobi and Sweets’
by CrimsonKunoichi
Summary: One brown-haired girl is causing terror among the shinobi. But why? And she isn't a ninja? Where the hell is she from anyways? And why is she always eating sweets?


Title: **About Shinobi and Sweets'**  
Category: Anime/Manga » Naruto  
Author: CrimsonKunoichi  
Language: English, Rating: Rated: T  
Genre: Humor/Adventure  
Published: 02-07-08, Updated: 02-07-08  
Chapters: 1, Words: 2,223

**Chapter 1: Chapter 1**

Title: About Shinobi and Sweets'

Pairings: I'm not sure there will be pairings

Rating: M - Not suitable for children or teens below the age of 16 with possible strong but non-explicit adult themes, references to violence, and strong coarse language.

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Naruto.

Chapter One: About Uchiha's and Snickers'

"I hate my life" the walls paid the utmost attention as the young girl continued her grumbling. She was used to complaining to the walls, no ever paid her any attention anyway -not in the way she felt they should- and she had learned to be happy by voicing her complains to the wall, and her many bars of Snickers. Walking over to the small desk near the door she plopped herself onto the chair facing her computer in a most ungraceful way -not like she actually cared she had never cared much for being ladylike, after all she did enjoy fighting and had a real love for violence, not to mention her musical taste which she said was absolutely normal- even though she only knew a handful of girls that did really LIKE what she listened to- not ladylike at all except for her clothes perhaps, amazingly the sixteen year old loved pink and her wardrobe consisted of pink, leopard print, black and red… mostly. Though she didn't actually like black, but, like every good teenager she insisted she was fat and therefore wore black to slim her figure -she still really didn't like black- and red? Well red was similar to pink and still another color so she liked red. She sat on the uncomfortable chair twirling her brown-grayish hair with her middle and index fingers while her other hand stretched to tap the power button for her computer. Maybe watching some anime and eating the entire box of Snickers might lighten her mood... Maybe.

Resuming cursing under her breath she began to work on opening her chocolates -something she found near impossible, "fucking wrap, do they even want people to open this fucking thing? Geez! Now would be a good time to have chakra strength just fucking wonderful, I hate this" a few curses later and the peanut filled bar was nestled between her lips like a cigar as she proceeded to twirl the chocolate between her lips with her tongue -much like when Genma plays with his senbon- diverting her attention to the screen she opened Word, her favorite writing tool, then moving the mouse to open Winamp after what seemed like years (in her impatient mind) the windows popped open soon followed by another containing her play list, "Nothing like Bodom to clear your head" but unlike what she expected no sound came from the loud speakers, she glared at the speakers, "stupid thing must be broken" she poked at the speakers as though they doing it on purpose to piss her off and her constant poking might annoy them into obedience.

Poke -stupid- poke -speaker- poke

After a few more pokes she came to the strong conclusion that either the speakers were actually broken or she was an idiot. Choosing the first, she moved around the desk to check the wires. "Fucking thing was unplugged" she gave the poor wire a homicidal glare. Plugging the thing were it belonged she plopped back in the ever uncomfortable chair.

"And we're in business she smiled -something rare- and turned her eyes to the screen to finish the first chapter to her new fic -she's a fanfic writer- she planned on writing the last three pages before it was ready to post. An arm stretch later and she was ready to write, ever slowly the words started to come forth. After typing for about fifteen minutes the soothing sound of Laiho's guttural vocal suddenly stopped. "Not again" she groaned, moving her hand to the speakers she brushed the CPU tower, a sizzle and she let out a small shriek pulling her arm to her body and turning to glare at tower -it had given her a shock- leaning over once more she moved her arm to reach the speakers her other offering support by holding on to the screen. But as she passed the tower her arm blushed it again giving her a second shock, followed by a second shriek and she pulled her hand back a little too forcibly causing her to lose her balance and topple over the chair, she shut her eyes and held out her arm to stop the fall except for... It never came. She forced one of her eyes to half open. Looking at her hand, which she could feel, was still firmly planted on the screen, but she wasn't holding on, her hand was stretched on the screen and sinking in? What! Both her eyes shot open to stare at her hand being sucked into the screen. "What the hell?" Her free hand shot to the screen immediately to aid her in realizing her trapped limb but as her second hand made contact with the screen it was sucked in as well she yelped and dug her heel into the wooden floor but only managed to tangle her feet around the straps of her backpack causing her to loose balance once more and before she could even think of a new escape plan she had already been sucked into the screen, back pack and all.

Loose locks of silky black hair danced with the wind occasionally whipping the pale cheeks of one mangekyou user as he leapt from tree branch to tree branch being closely followed by his blue skinned partner. The two traveled in absolute silence, they were making their way back to the current Akatsuki base, their backs turned to Konoha where they had just finished their recon mission. Kisame shot his partner an odd look and immediately came to a stop upon noticing Itachi had landed on a branch and was scanning the area with his sharingan, "What is it Itachi? I don't sense any chakra signature." Itachi ignored his partner's question to continue his search, he couldn't sense chakra either but there was something there and it wasn't some stray civilian. "There is no chakra signature" Itachi explained to his perplexed partner after a few minutes, "But something's here, and it's not just some civilian." Barely had the Uchiha finished his explanation when a glass shattering scream filled the air, Itachi looked up just in time to see a blur that had a striking resemblance of a young girl with brown hair crashing down on him. With skillful speed he caught the girl in his arms before she could hit the braches. Suzu -I'm finally telling you her name it's Suzu! Yay- opened her eyes to see what -or who- had stopped her fall. Her dark green orbs opened to stare at none other than Uchiha Itachi; he had stopped her fall and was holding her in his arms... Wait, what? Suzu yelped and immediately covered her mouth with her hand, and then proceeded to openly stare at the un-amused face of the Uchiha mass murderer. Absolute shock was plastered all over her face and a 'WTF?' Sign hung over her forehead flashing in big red neon letters.

"Who are you?" Itachi asked fighting hard against showing his grand curiosity towards the girl that fell from the sky.

But, all the poor girl managed to do was gawk at the man holding her, in pure disbelieve.

"Who are you?" Itachi calmly asked once more.

"Uchiha... Itachi" she said in a breathless whisper. "You're I-ita-chi" she stammered. Quickly looking around she spotted who she was looking for. "Hoshigaki Kisame" she muttered, staring at both Akatsuki's in pure awe.

"Well, she knows we are" Kisame stated in a highly amused tone.

"Answer my question girl." She turned back to face Itachi as she heard him address her.

"I'm Suzu" she gulped.

"Where are you from?" He asked.

Suzu panicked. "What do I say now? Damn it, I can't tell him I'm from another world. Oh fuck" continuous curses flowed through her mind while she silently stared at Itachi like he had killed her whole family before her eyes.

"I'm from Suna" She reasoned it would be best if she said she'd come from Suna, seeing she knew more about said village, other than Konoha because that's were Itachi was from.

"You are not a kunoichi," Itachi stated in a matter-of-factly.

"Geez! you don't have to rub it in Mr. I'm-Uchiha-Itachi-I-killed-my-family-and-have-the-mangekyou" she said crossing her arms brooding.

Itachi narrowed his eyes sending the girl a homicidal glare. It was that moment that the girl noticed her backpack hanging from her leg she must have dragged it along with her... Then she remembered!

"What are you?" Itachi asked, not noticing or choosing to ignore the girl's daydreaming stated of mind.

"Snickers!" She suddenly remembered that the chocolate she had managed to open was gone, and expressed her surprise/horror out loud not having noticed that Itachi had asked her a question. Itachi continued to stare

What a strange girl, and what the hell is snickers?

"Oi, Uchiha" Suzu called out loudly waving her arms in front of his face. "Can you let me go"

By now Kisame was fighting hard to hold his laughter, seeing Itachi get flustered by some girl wasn't something you'd see everyday and as hilarious as it was it was still in his be interest to be quiet.

"Hey Uchiha, listen, I've lost my damn snickers now, can you put me down so I can try and find it, damn it?" Suzu said while waving her arms with enthusiasm that would make Naruto jealous.

Kisame walked around his stoic partner and the strange girl to poke at the bag dangling from her feet. "What's in here?" Kisame asked poking the bag. Suzu's eyes lit up her bag had come with her and her snickers were in there… all seventeen! Ha! Maybe this wasn't so bad after all. Poke- "Oiiii! What's in here?" -poke- Suzu's happiness faded as soon as it had come, that fish-man had NOT just poked HER Snickers. "Hey! Those are MY snickers in there and you'd better not have ruined them! Fish-man" Suzu glared at the mist nin while struggling in Itachi's grasp. Itachi had amazingly stood quietly watching through the screaming and insult's and all that senseless talk about something named Snickers? Really, what the hell was that?

Kisame had lost all amusement for the girl as she called him fish-man, first Itachi now him? She HAD to have a death wish. "Do you want to die girl?" Kisame yelled at her. "You must be really stupid" Very Kisame, calling everyone stupid, "Me stupid? You're a fucking fish!" A grin spread across her features as a certain fanart image flashed in her mind.

Flashback

Dark green eyes travel over the screen; the low clicking sound was the only noise. Suzu was flipping through Google in search of a new Deidara poster for her screen saver. When she saw something. -Click- "So listen yeah. Kisame is a shark, and sharks are fish. So Kisame is a fish do you understand Itachi-san?" Suzu's lips twitched. The clicking sound was replaced by hysterical laughter as the girl held onto the desk to keep from falling off her chair.

Flashback end

Suzu's lips twitched. How very déjà vu "Ha ha ha mua ha ha ha ha ha" she held onto Itachi's cloak for dear life. "Mua ha ha ha ha!" Kisame could only stare; this girl had a REAL problem. Itachi's patience was at its best shape as he fought hard the urges to use the sharingan on this girl. "God knows she deserves the mangekyou" Itachi scowled inwardly

(Uchiha's don't scowl).

"Laughing in the face of death are we?" said Kisame, glaring at the girl he was sure he didn't like already. Suzu ignored the mist nin and turned to face Itachi "So listen, yeah" she said in mock serious tone trying not to laugh. "Kisame is a shark!" She pointed to Kisame, "And sharks are fish" she was now opening and closing her mouth like a fish (to make her point), "So Kisame is a fish. Do you understand Itachi-san?" She faced the Uchiha once more grinning from ear to ear.

By now Kisame had unhooked Samehada and was running his calloused fingers over the hilt of the legendary sword. The only thing keeping him from following his primal urges was the tint of anger in his otherwise stoic partner. Dark green orbs scanned the Uchiha either not noticing or plain ignoring the flicker of anger on the Akatsuki carrying her. Hands still firmly planted on the Itachi chest she fixed her gaze on his own, only to flinch at the sight of a clearly burning sharingan. But Itachi's anger wasn't the only thing she noticed, amazingly, yet at the same time not so amazingly, she became aware of the stoic man's chiseled chest ripe full of solid muscles. "Nice" she chided to herself, though out loud, as she ran her open hand over his chest now openly ignoring his anger. "I can see why you have so many fan girls," she giggled. Looking into his eyes she passed out.

Yes I know it's stupid! thanks for pointing it out xD

Review?


End file.
